Author Topic: I don't think I'm right for this.  (Read 1342 times)

Patrick1

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #15 on: 11:05:27, 02/09/19 »
The suggestions above for finding company of an evening, even if you are solo walking, are good ones. Alternatively, if you are going to spend the evening alone, make sure you've got a plan to be doing something that you can look forward to. And that doesn't have to be lying in your bed listening to the silence, however appealing that is for some of us! I like to have a good book with me - and with smartphones / kindles there's no reason not to have a whole library in your rucksack. I also like having the time to potter around and take photos. Some people listen to music or watch movies, spot birds or wildlife. But whatever it is, there's got to be something which has you thinking, at the end of the day, "Oh great, I can make camp soon so that I can...". Fill in those dots yourself and you might find solo camping suddenly has much greater appeal.

Ronin83

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #16 on: 12:10:46, 02/09/19 »
I do lots of multi-day walks, but never camp because I am too much of a weak wimp to carry all the gear.  You can still stay in amazing places, and I find that if you walk alone it is much easier to get into conversation with people, whether along the route (if it isn't too remote) or in hostels, hotels or whatever in the evenings.
Long distance walks and wild camping are two different things.  Don't feel that because you don't enjoy one you can't do the other.


Exactly. Stay in hostels or pubs.
Probs be easier to convince people to join too.
A perfect multi dayer is to do some of the camino de Santiago in northern spain. It's an extremely popular and busy route with loads of hostels for walkers. You'd probably only be alone if u wanted to be.
I did a bit of the lebaniego one which is much less famous and even that was quite busy (in summer) with busy hostels along the way serving dinner and breakfast.
We did do an alternative route though which meant there was literally no one on day 2. It was a hard day and I was certainly glad to arrive in a village with a bar and have a hot shower. I wouldn't have enjoyed camping after that tough day.

pdstsp

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #17 on: 13:44:19, 02/09/19 »
Gosh - sorry to hear things aren't working out for the TMB.  As for a way to fill the next couple of days - can you get a bunk at one of the local refuges (Lac Blanc?) for the night - great walk up and lots of company for the evening?

scottk

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #18 on: 19:12:40, 02/09/19 »
You could try a solo long distance walk on one of the more popular routes. The WHW would be very busy if you did it during summer and you would seldom (probably never) be alone at any of the bunkhouses or campsites.
I really enjoy solo walking and camping as you can please yourself but walking with someone also has benefits which outweigh the occasional downsides.

Owen

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #19 on: 20:17:01, 02/09/19 »
Difficult one this as I'm another that doesn't like company on my long camping trips. I can happily spend weeks on end out in the wilderness along but, to be on my own in a crowded place, like in a pub, I find really lonely. It's as if, when there are no people around I don't miss them but when there are and I don't know them I do miss other people. I'm not someone who would strike up a conversation with a stranger, that would be something I'd find really difficult.


If you really can't manage on your own, have you thought about joining an organized group, such as a guided tour? You'd have someone to walk with and hopefully a common interest, even if it's only the walk you're on.   

Rob Goes Walking

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #20 on: 20:44:57, 02/09/19 »
I find it easy to strike up conversations with strangers. Apart from my family most of my conversations are with strangers. Have trouble keeping them going sometimes but starting them is easy.

Yet I've occasionally felt lonely in a crowded place too. Not a yearning for their company rather a sadness because I'm not part of it, even though at that moment I don't particularly want to be.

I guess I'm lucky, mostly I'm happy with my own company or the company of others but lately I've been wanting more people in my life, especially people interested in fell walking or the gym as those are the places I feel best.

Anyway I'm not a wild camper so how I am isn't all that relevant. But it goes to show even if you are the sort who can socialise with strangers you can still be lonely in a crowded place.

scottk

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #21 on: 21:37:01, 02/09/19 »
Rob,
Never say never- you might get into wild camping too!!

gunwharfman

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #22 on: 14:01:57, 03/09/19 »
I have no problem with hiking alone all day, in fact, I really enjoy it, but at the same time I do like to meet people, I'm never keen just to kick my heels around a tent during the evening. I treat dawn and dusk differently, daylight is for hiking, darkness is for eating, drinking and then sleeping. I don't cook and always seek out a pub, restaurant or cafe (sometimes I even wandered into a village hall meeting, just to be nosey) and will always make an effort to talk to someone. I don't care who they are, everyone is valuable and of interest to me. I'm lucky I think because I find it easy to strike up a conversation with anyone, I just need eye contact, a smile and a soundbite to get me going. That can be a quip about the beer, about Brexit, asking the way, the sound of a motorbike going by, a cobweb in the corner, "so nice to have boiled potatoes for a change," the conversation prompters and opportunities available to me are endless! If I get stuck for a night and have to wild camp I can live with that until the next day. Direct eye contact and facial expression is the key to it all!

I too have had those days when 'nothing goes right' or I'm feeling 'washed out and down in the dumps' etc. My 'solution' is to eat, look at the sunsets, read a book on my phone, have a wander around, take a few nips from my brandy flask and then just get in my tent and go to sleep. Tomorrow is not only another day, tomorrow is another opportunity!

Sad to hear that the Les Houche site is closed down, I think there is another one about a mile back, but have never stayed there.

Doddy

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #23 on: 16:12:13, 03/09/19 »
 Do a few multi day walk near home to get accustomed to being on your own. Walk into the evening so there is less time in the shelter.
Handing anxiety issues before a trip:

Handling anxiety during a trip:
Have a positive mantra for the occasions when negative thoughts come into our head.
Visualise the exact opposite of any doubts you may have.
See yourself reaching your goal.
Feel the warm glow of admiration when telling people about your trip.
Soak up the atmosphere.
Say out loud how well you are doing.
In two or three days you will think; "What on earth was I so worried about?" In four or five days your next overwhelming feeling will be “How am I ever going to leave this place” and in 60 days, it will be "When can I get back out here?"


Doddy

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #24 on: 16:16:52, 03/09/19 »
I seem to making mistakes in copying this onto here but I do hope you get the gist.

Doddy

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #25 on: 16:18:30, 03/09/19 »
Handing anxiety issues before a trip.
In two or three days you will think; "What on earth was I so worried about?" In four or five days your next overwhelming feeling will be “How am I ever going to leave this place” and in 60 days, it will be "When can I get back out here

fernman

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #26 on: 17:03:52, 06/09/19 »
Extraordinary!. I think I've finally met my polar opposite  :)

Everyone is different, some just don't have the mindset for a pure wilderness experience. As can readily be seen from my backpacks, I have an innate desire - and expertise from years of experience - to avoid other people like the plague. The ideal trip for me is to walk and camp for days without catching sight of a soul, even from a distance.

Even weirder, that's two in one thread  :) I'd be depressed with people constantly hovering around.

I remember that old anecdote about the wise old sage who, when asked about the essential difference between the Japanese and westerners, said: "the westerner can never be content to just sit alone in an empty room".

I can relate to that, I'd be fine with it.

But it's clear from the trip reports on your site that you share many of them with your other half!
Speaking personally, part of the appeal of a multiple-day trip is to get away from mine, and I'm sure she looks forward to me going too! Why else would she have bought me a new tent?
(P.S. we've just celebrated our 50th wedding anniversary.)

Rob Goes Walking

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #27 on: 17:14:49, 06/09/19 »
(P.S. we've just celebrated our 50th wedding anniversary.)

Congratulations fernman that's a milestone for sure.

vghikers

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #28 on: 18:44:59, 06/09/19 »
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But it's clear from the trip reports on your site that you share many of them with your other half!

Ah yes, but that's different - as a 'unit' we avoid others wherever possible. There have been lapses of judgement, such as when we pitched at the summit of Foel Fras at the summer solstice, forgetting that it was the optimum time for the Welsh 3000s attempts!. Also a pitch at Esk Hause - unwise.

Quote
Speaking personally, part of the appeal of a multiple-day trip is to get away from mine, and I'm sure she looks forward to me going too! Why else would she have bought me a new tent?
(P.S. we've just celebrated our 50th wedding anniversary.)

Another interesting M.O., it's evidently successful for you - congrats on the 50th. (we haven't quite reached 40) :)

Bigfoot_Mike

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Re: I don't think I'm right for this.
« Reply #29 on: 19:44:27, 06/09/19 »
My wife is also happy for me to walk by myself, as she doesn’t like hills. We reached our 25th Anniversary this summer.