Author Topic: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser  (Read 845 times)


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TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« on: 22:52:27, 25/03/20 »
I went out for my daily constitutional this afternoon (that would be a walk, I've not run out of loo roll yet) and decided to spice things up a bit with a little trespass around a field up for sale with planning permission for a new housing development  :(   I hope nobody buys it as it's the local barn owl's stomping ground.  I quickly discovered it's also home to a couple of young deer.  Social distancing wasn't a problem for this chap:

Further round the field I discovered a little bridge:

... which solved the mystery of whether or not there is "through" access to another lane I've not yet explored.

Escaping unscathed and undiscovered from my little trespass, I did a bit of pavement plodding, passing a dog walker at the required 2 metre minimum and saying that apologetic "hello".  Quite an easy task really because I got side-tracked by this:

The washing machine door has been in the fence for a number of years now and usually has some fish in it (pretend ones, not real ones) though there was once a photograph of a scrunched up face in there as if someone was trying to get out.  Shame on them for having a sense of humour. 

I wandered round the corner and onto Mattocks Lane.  A fair few years ago the residents of the (then) new houses, applied for the road to be classed as a private driveway - access only to their houses / no public access (it used to be a public right of way back in the year dot) so, because the council were no longer maintaining it, they stopped the bin collections from their doors (as they don't go up driveways) and requested the residents brought their bins to the junction with the main road.  Twenty years later and the right of way has been reinstated and the council collect from up the lane again.  I guess nobody thought that one through at the time  :D 

Mattocks lane (from halfway up):

... it's a very long lane.

Finally, I was out into the open countryside (ish):

Just round the corner then I could see miles and miles of fields and it gladdened my heart to hear skylarks.  I did take a photograph of the view but it just looks like a brown stripe (the fields) and a blue stripe (the sky) and was even less interesting than the rest of my pics  ::)

I reached the junction with the farm road and headed across it and up along the wrong side of the drainage ditch to the little bridge, which I crossed, and went back down the other side:

To continue on would have meant I would have to do a mile or so of road walking on what is quite a busy road with no verges... although now is probably the best time to do that!

Returning back to the farm track (technically another trespass) I meandered past the flotsam and jetsam of farm equipment and ... well... a pungent pile of crap (to put it bluntly).  Sorry, no photograph of that.

Neither did I take a photograph of the random duck that flew past, or the two swans that looked like they were heading to the secret lake (but that's a trespass for another day).

All too soon I was at the main back road into town so embarked on yet another trespass through the apple orchard.  Normally I just walk along the field edge until the other tractor exit and get back onto the road but, no, this time I decided to walk round the edge of the orchard/hay meadow instead.... A bit of a recce to see if there was a sneaky access onto the railtrack (disused) from here. No, there isn't.  So I did circuit, returning back through the orchard:

It's a pity they've planted them so uniformly.  If it was me, I'd have gone random and created a little meandering trail through.  But it's not me, and they haven't.  Not that I should have been walking there in the first place.

Back on the main road again I spotted an absolutely cracking display of daffodils on the other side of the road and I think this is the first time I've just been able to cross without having to wait for a gap in the traffic:

My legs didn't feel like they'd done enough walking yet so I turned onto the old railway track:

... and spent the next 10 minutes actively avoiding other people.  I have genuinely never seen so many people out along here as I did today.  To be honest, everyone I passed was really quite good-humoured about the whole social distancing thing, unlike me who just shouted "GET OUT OF MY PERSONAL SPACE YOU MORON" whilst delivering a Death-Stare and shaking my fist.  Which isn't really that threatening because I only have small hands.

All too soon I was onto the playing field and back to civilisation again.

My legs still didn't feel done but I'd run out of walk.  I'm quite impressed really because it turns out I'd walked 4 miles without even realising.

Anyhow, if you haven't nodded off yet, thanks for reading  :)

Oh, and the heading?  It's "Confessions of a Trespasser"...which obviously you realised...right?  ;)

Is the search over if you find nothing?


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #1 on: 22:59:44, 25/03/20 »
Excellent account - and countryside that I'd feel right at home in. Thanks!  O0


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #2 on: 23:12:29, 25/03/20 »
Nice pics, it's good to be able to get out and stretch your legs.

me who just shouted "GET OUT OF MY PERSONAL SPACE YOU MORON" whilst delivering a Death-Stare and shaking my fist.
So you've not changed anything due to the social distancing rules then.


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #3 on: 23:17:42, 25/03/20 »
Thanks for the TR, Mel. You live in a lovely area.
Too little, too late, too bad......


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #4 on: 07:42:56, 26/03/20 »
 :D  I enjoyed that, thanks Mel! Nice piccies too O0
***Happiness is only a smile away***


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #5 on: 08:21:19, 26/03/20 »
Very nice photos Mel     :)     

Like you, I love to hear the skylarks. They often accompany my walks on the South Downs    :)


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #6 on: 08:44:22, 26/03/20 »
A delight to read, Mel, thanks.
Don't give away too many clues about where you live, someone might track you down  :o

From one T*****sser to another!


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #7 on: 08:56:37, 26/03/20 »
Keep trespassing and posting reports to give relief to those of us who normally, but can't now, drive to reach the countryside.
These boots are made for walking.... so long as the rest of my body agrees


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #8 on: 09:29:36, 26/03/20 »
Brilliant :)

Thank you, Mel.

I've seen several Roe deer in Haldon forestry on my recent early evening bimbles. Mostly solitary, they are much shyer than the larger Fallows which crash about in herds. You did well to get a photo of one - walking quietly alone has it's merits.
So many paths, so little time


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #9 on: 09:34:43, 26/03/20 »
Brilliant. Seeing wildlife like that on a walk is the icing on the cake..great pics
Virtue is more to be feared than vice, because it's excesses are not subject to the regulation of conscience - Adam Smith


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #10 on: 11:47:39, 26/03/20 »
I dont like this TR. Its too silly.


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #11 on: 11:56:13, 26/03/20 »
Nice pics and write up mel O0
You certainly had a nice day for it
Leave only footprints, take only photographs, kill only time ...

#LeaveNoTrace youtube



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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #12 on: 12:19:15, 26/03/20 »
Well done Mel, do a detect a step from physical trespass into the realms of intellectual trespass or that of virtual ways.
Further round the field I discovered a little bridge:

... which solved the mystery of whether or not there is "through" access to another lane I've not yet explored.
A first step in questioning the use of ways and infrastructure. Bridges or perhaps a culvert and 'who' also crossed them, other than those, who claim the right to.
A nice TR with ironic twist and complimentary to the circumstances many of us find ourselves in.

I am fortunate that there is a field gate a short distance from the A road that passes the front of my house, this yields some good distance of field margins trapped in suburbia. There is also a culvert protected by British Rail fencing, though a fallen bough has mitigated it's security. Dare I say more, but the position is well secluded and I think I and a badger may be only ones to see the benefit of this way.
Their Land is in Our Country.


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #13 on: 16:02:39, 26/03/20 »
Nice write-up and photo's Mel. I like the washing machine door idea. Could be used for all manner of displays.

Reports from the mountains, peaks and lakes are always good, but it's great to see lesser trod areas too  O0

I had a trip to that neck of the woods a couple of days before Christmas. A short bimble along the foreshore at Paull, followed by a walk into Hedon, haddock and chips on the hoof, and back again. I took the road route as I wasn't confident the havenside path would be passable. Also had a walk around East Park. A couple of enjoyable, and nostalgic days out.


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Re: TR: Confessions of a T*****sser
« Reply #14 on: 17:56:13, 26/03/20 »
Wonderful report and pics Mel  O0

It cheered me up during my lunch break at work. I am still going to work, I hadn't realised what I did was essential. I might have misheard what they said, perhaps they meant expendable  ;)

It just goes to show your photos prove we can walk from our front doors and see something interesting enough to photograph, keep them coming Mel  O0
"Who would've thought...... you are light and darkness coming through" words by Tim Armstrong